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Strange Things Are Afoot on the List of the Day

For those of you not ’80s and awesome enough to catch the reference…

RIP George Carlin, we miss you!

Yes, it’s that time of year again. The glorious anniversary of the birth of actor Keanu Reeves. Though initially dismissed early in his career as something of a doofus (perhaps owing to the remarkable popularity and continuing influence of his work in “Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure”), Reeves experienced something of a career renaissance in the 00s. This, of course, was prompted by his starring role in a little sci-fi action film called “The Matrix,” but extended to acclaimed turns in other films as well, such as “The Gift” and the animated “A Scanner Darkly.”

But it’s not just in the movies where Reeves has become staggeringly popular in recent years. A photo of him enjoying a sandwich on a park bench ended up inspiring the beloved and widely circulated “Sad Keanu” meme as well:

Left out again, just like that ‘Bram Stoker’s Dracula’ wrap party…

But the guy’s turning 47 today (!), so we come not to mock him, but to CELEBRATE him. Hence, Ranker’s publication of The 7 Greatest True Keanu Reeves Stories. These are absolutely 100% verified facts about Keanu’s long and storied life, including…

– Details about his wrestling match with Alice Cooper

– The shocking truth about his multiple motorcycle and hockey-related accidents

– His sideline in paranormal investigations

and much, much more. It’s enough to make you re-evaluate your entire impression of Keanu Reeves, the actor, as well as Keanu Reeves, the man. Or, if nothing else, enough to make you go “Whoa!”