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I'd Like to Thank the List of the Day… and My Agent

Tonight is the 63rd annual Primetime Emmy Awards, and you know what that means… Los Angeles’ supply of collagen is at a historic low tonight. You want thick, lustrous, not-at-all-even-vaguely-human-looking lips, you better be willing to pay zombipocalypse prices.

It also means millions of Americans (and probably, let’s say, 7-10 other people from countries around the globe!) will be rapt at their television sets, watching celebrities give one another golden statues for being so incredibly hilarious and awesome.

OK, that sounds a bit cynical for a corporate communication. Let me try again. Something with some more SEO-type keywords…

She made all this money just by typing SEO-friendly keywords. For real. It works.

Once again, it’s Emmy night, that time when the world of television’s brightest stars come out to shine and celebrate the very best of the medium. (Though unless it’s on HBO or about cooking meth, the options are still surprisingly thin, let’s be honest.)

Oh well, I tried.

Anyway, Ranker has a variety of fascinating lists to check out while you’re waiting to see if Jon Cryer gets his name called, and we all find out exactly what Charlie Sheen-induced PTSD looks like up close.

Get an idea for who might come out on top tonight by reading our Emmy Predictions list. Then come taunt us in the comments afterwards for everything we got wrong. (Just for fun, try to be more clever than, say, this: “Julianna Marguiles? FAIL.” That’s where we’re setting the bar.)

Outstanding Comedy Series in particular looks to be a competitive category. “The Big Bang Theory” and “Parks and Recreation” are both nominated for the first time this year, and they’re up against 3 heavy hitters – “Modern Family” (which won last year), “Glee” (nominated last year and beloved for some reason) and 3-time winner “30 Rock.” See every show that has taken the top comedy prize on our VoteRanked list of the greatest Outstanding Comedy Series Emmy winners. And by the way, has anyone ever seen or heard of a show called “My World and Welcome To It”? It apparently has won an Emmy but I have to think it’s just some elaborate hoax:

This is seriously a thing? Really? I don’t believe you.

For more Emmy history, we’ve collected several of the most glaring Emmy snubs of all time. This year has two HUGE oversights in a single category, actually – Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series.

The two funniest characters on TV this past season were Ron Swanson from “Parks and Recreation” and Leon Black from “Curb Your Enthusiasm.” Yet neither of the actors behind these characters – Nick Offerman and JB Smoove, respectively – were nominated in this category this year. Seriously, Academy… every single person with a Y chromosome who appeared on “Modern Family” gets a nod, but not Ron f-ing Swanson? Are you mad??!?

A cat that looks like Ron Swanson, expressing how I feel about Ron Swanson not being honored by the TV Academy.

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The List of the Week: September 11, 2011 Edition

Time for another look back at the lists that mattered this week on Ranker.com. Might be a big of a somber post, in light of the 10th anniversary of the September 11th terrorist attacks. Just seems wrong to delve into the usual list of the week round-up style hilarity. (I know, I know, hilarity isn’t even a strong enough word… but I’m trying to be serious here.)

Ranker community members noted the tragic events of 10 years past this week with several compelling lists, from this collection of films looking at the events of 9/11 to a trip through the history of US conspiracy theories, including the arguments that, and I quote, “9/11 was an inside job.”

Also, don’t miss this list of the ways 9/11 changed how we talk, a look at phrases and concepts introduced to daily American life by the events of 9/11. (Including that old favorite, “if _______, then the terrorists will truly have won.”

There were some other happenings this week worthy of Ranker lists.

For one, “Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star” at long last hit movie screens, and the acclaim was universally absent. In fact, with a current rating on Rotten Tomatoes of 0%, it’s safe to say that the film is the worst-reviewed of 2011. (Really saying something…) Exactly HOW unfortunate and joke-free is “Bucky Larson”? Here’s a sampling from Ranker’s list of The Worst Bucky Larson Reviews:

“You may or may not laugh, but at least you’ll be closer to death and no better for it.” — Rob Humanick, Slant Magazine

Ouch.

In other entertainment news, “Curb Your Enthusiasm” signs off from its 8th season tonight, prompting Ranker users to look back on the best-ever premium cable shows. Curb is currently coming in at #3. Who’s doing better? Check out the list and see, why don’t you?


What? Stop looking at me like that!

Earlier this week, in a surprise move, Google purchased dining guide publishers Zagat for an undisclosed sum. (Our sources say $300 billion, which is why we stopped listening to them a while back.)

This makes over 100 other companies that have been gobbled up by the search giant in the past few years. But what were Google’s best-ever acquisitions? Leading right now? DODGEBALL! No, just kidding. It’s YouTube. And come on… it can’t be that hard to see why…


Awwww, how cute. I’ll give you $300 billion!

Finally this week saw the return of NFL football, when it seemed so close to being called off completely. And what better way to celebrate America’s game to Sunday afternoons than voting on and nominating your picks for the Greatest Running Back of All Time. Come on, give it a try. It’s one of the few times in life you’ll be able to give OJ Simpson a thumbs up and still feel good about yourself.

And with that, we’re signing off from another look back at the Ranker lists of the week. Be safe out there.

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Give Me All the List of the Days That You Have

It’s the height of summer, and the crew from Ranker has clearly missed a lot of its favorite shows. So we’ve seen an uptick in lists collecting the best moments from certain popular TV characters.

First up, for obvious reasons, is “Parks and Recreation’s” own Ron Swanson, a man whose staunch libertarianism and love for salted pork products has rocketed him into the Internet popularity stratosphere in 2011. (He even has a blog about cats who resemble him AND his own fake Ben and Jerry’s flavor!”)

Ron Swanson Ben and Jerry's

Not remotely one of the series’ focal points when it debuted a few years back, Nick Offerman’s Director of the Parks and Rec department has taken over as the show’s primarily protagonist of late.

Ranker’s rundown of Ron Swanson’s Greatest Moments includes a number of great clips of Swanson being Swanson. Leading things off, naturally, is the Ron Swanson Pyramid of Greatness:

<iframe width=”640” height=”390” src=”http://www.youtube.com/embed/Oxnhhvv_tYo” frameborder=”0” allowfullscreen></iframe>

Remember, skim milk is on there twice for a REASON. (Also, there’s just something funny about a grown man saying the phrase “deer meat.”)

One of our favorite comedy series is actually back this week after a year-long hiatus. Yes, it’s Larry David’s HBO powerhouse “Curb Your Enthusiasm.” And though we love Larry, Marty Funkhauser, Richard Lewis and all the other usual suspects, it’s comedian J.B. Smoove as Larry’s one-time houseguest Leon Black that we felt really deserved a page of his own.

Leon Black

You made a list for me? RankHer.com? Never heard of it. Who gave you this number?

Leon’s Quotes and Scenes page can get a little…blue…but we tried to really capture the character’s ESSENCE on the page. Which means you’re going to be talking about butts a lot. There’s just not much that can be done about that…